For many weeks and in fact a few months, I have been experiencing panic attacks and anxiety. I know that this is actually a result and not a preemptive condition, because of all of the changes occurring in my life at this time.
I met someone. He's everything that I've ever dreamed I'd find in a man. He's incredibly smart, funny, charming, and he loves me. For the longest time, I thought that I would always be alone; doomed to wander life as a woman on her own. And now, I have this wonderful man in my life and everything should be absolutely wonderful as well.
So, why do I have this heart pounding, aching feeling every single morning? Why does it wake me in the middle of the night and why do I wake with it at 5:30 a.m. every day?
These are the questions I will be finding the answers to in this blog. I need to find out why this is happening and why I can't get past it. I feel that pharmaceuticals are NOT the answer for me. I don't want to have to take them; they are a cop-out and absolutely the last resort.
I will be logging in each day to measure, report and try to make some kind of sense of these attacks on my every day life. I hope that in some way, I'm helping someone else that deals with them. They truly do interfere with my life and frankly, I'm sick of it. It's time to take control and live my life without this sick and tired feeling. The tiredness is, I'm sure because of the constant fighting of this feeling, but I can't sleep because of the feeling. So, where is the balance? Where is MY balance? This is what I will be looking for.
